The past few months have been an adventure, and if I had to pick a theme, hands down, it would be surrender.
But first, a little backstory: A few years ago, I was shown an image in meditation. If only I could take a screenshot of my brain because, man oh man, was it ever cool. Thanks to Pinterest, though, I can show you something that looks pretty darn close. 😉
In the meditation, I was at my childhood home, swinging on my swing set. I could feel that “uppy” sensation in my stomach as I swung higher and higher, and then I realized that the scene around me–the yard, our house, the neighbors’ houses–was all an image; it wasn’t real. As I swung higher I could see, just barely, over the top of this image.
With that, I let go of the swing and leapt over the image into goddess only knows what.
When I landed, it was nighttime and I was in a garden. The air was fragrant with exotic flowers and the scent of rich soil, and insects and tree frogs were singing in hypnotic synchrony. I could have stayed here forever.
Up ahead through the vines, I noticed tiny, twinkling lights, and as I moved closer, I saw a long table set beneath an arched trellis. The trellis was festooned with plants and hanging lanterns, and while I initially thought the table was set for dinner, as I approached, I saw two books at each place setting. They were my future books: one the main text, the other a companion workbook.
I heard voices to my left and, following the sounds of laughter and conversation, I came upon an outer oven and sitting area. A chef was using the clay oven to prepare delicious, local foods, and I was leading a workshop. More details continued to flow as the meditation progressed, but suffice it to say, from that day forward I knew that, one day, I would be teaching workshops and retreats in a magical setting.
Over the years, that picture has been continually fleshed out: I know the topic of my first book and have begun writing it; I learned that in order to fully facilitate the types of workshops I am meant to lead I needed to become a massage therapist, and I’ll be graduating in August and opening my office in October; I’m being called to create a magical retreat center, and my guides have given me copious details as to what that will one day encompass; and I’ve experienced synchronicities too numerous to count in all other aspects of this dream being realized.
What I want to explore today, though, is what it looks like when things don’t seem to be flowing, and how to recognize that the flow is still very much happening.
Over the past two weeks, my husband and I have experienced numerous synchronicities. Here’s the nutshell version:
- We met with a new accountant, and in the week between our first meeting and the follow-up session, he “just so happened” to learn that one of his other clients was selling land that met our specifications down to the number of acres.
- We looked at the land, and while it was more than we had planned to spend, it seemed ideal.
- On a whim, I asked a family member if they were comfortable with me approaching a contact of theirs with an investment proposition to help us finance the land and building of the future retreat center.
- Unexpectedly, my family member readily offered to invest…and two days later I had a call from another family member who made the same offer. A third offer came in a few days later.
- My husband gets a well-deserved raise–yay!
All of this seemed well and good, and I thought, perhaps we’ve found the land–this might be it!
And then the flow seemed to slow to a trickle.
- I talked to someone who has a great deal of building experience, and they pointed out potential issues with the land that could prevent or hamper the building of the retreat center.
- After going over our finances, we got a clearer idea of how tight things would be, even with investors, if we were to purchase this expensive piece of land.
So, now what?
I returned to meditation and saw the following image: There was a beautiful sphere of light inside of me, and I instinctively reached out to touch it and hold it. In doing so, my hands obscured some of the light.
My guides explained that this dream within me was luminous, indeed, but if I grasp too tightly, and if I believe that I need to do all the things in order to keep this dream alive, what I’m actually doing is blocking that light from shining forth and attracting to me precisely what I need to manifest this dream.
And then I saw how the conversation in which I had learned about potential problems had given me so much valuable information that I can use when looking at other properties. My husband and I also learned the importance of finding a general contractor (GC), which sparked the realization that, hey, we actually have a family member who is an amazingly skilled GC and who is looking for a fun project to work on in his retirement. What a gift!
And in this process, we also learned that we have three people happily prepared to invest their money in this dream, something I had no idea was even an option before.
Here’s the big-picture lesson:
When we get overly attached to individual steps on our journey, such as this piece of land being “the one,” or this plan working out in precisely this way, we block the flow.
With our grasping control, we obscure our guiding light.
If, instead, we treat every encounter as assistance on our journey, and not the end-all-be-all point, we receive gifts and assistance everywhere–even in those situations that don’t work out the way we hoped.
In fact, I believe that we receive our greatest gifts and assistance primarily through situations that don’t pan out the way we expect them to.
Why? Well, if you are trying to create something new, you must be willing to let go of attachment to what you already know.
Logically, something new cannot be something you already know.
Thus, in order to allow that which is new into our lives, we have to be open to the unexpected, to the “hey, this isn’t what I asked for” moments.
It is in those moments that the Divine delivers to us the new and the life-changing–the ingredients for our wildest dreams.